Empathic Distress

Written by: Ledell Ong

Do closeness and intimacy often overwhelm you? Do you find it hard to detach from others?

Do you feel troubled by the problems of others?

For our dear readers who can relate, this article is for you.

What is Empathic Distress?

Empathic distress is the strong aversive and self-oriented response to the suffering of others, accompanied by the desire to withdraw from a situation to protect one’s self from excessive negative feelings (Dowling, 2018).

In short, empathic distress is the prevailing urge we have to withdraw when we become overwhelmed by the problems of the people around us. Most commonly observed in people with an anxious attachment style, the inclination to over-empathize leaves many overexposed and vulnerable to a barrage of negativity. Attempting to protect themselves, people may begin to feel apathetic or withdraw by cutting their friends off.

Psychologist Mario Mikulincer, specializing in Attachment and Relationships, dictates that our inherent altruistic nature that comes from empathy with someone in need tends to become muddled, suppressed, or overridden when people feel insecure.

Empathic Distress VERSUS Compassion

Though likened to compassion, empathic distress is far from it. When met with the troubles of others, our initial empathic responses can shift in one of two directions - toward empathetic distress or empathic concern.

Compassion, or empathic concern, typically has a selfless connotation, while empathic distress derives from self-rooted emotions and intentions. Compassion also does not fatigue, while empathic distress often leads to burnout.

These two concepts are on opposite ends of the spectrum and tow an extremely thin line, and It is important to remember to protect ourselves so that we can protect others.

References

Dowling T. (2018). Compassion does not fatigue!. The Canadian veterinary journal = La revue veterinaire canadienne, 59(7), 749–750.

Klimecki, Olga & Singer, Tania. (2011). Empathic Distress Fatigue Rather Than Compassion Fatigue? Integrating Findings from Empathy Research in Psychology and Social Neuroscience. 10.1093/acprof:oso/9780199738571.003.0253.